Weekly state: yearning.

I am devouring moldy cheese and no one can stop me.

While the cheese slowly untangles the endorphins I contemplate whether the longing for something attainable is more rewarding that the yearning for things never to be reached. As arrogant organisms on earth, humans have an unhealthy appetite for more, notwithstanding already being pampered.

Nutrition, worth in any sense, position. MORE.

As they do, Germans have expressed this sentiment and actively acknowledged the: seemingly intrinsic nature of humankind. Sehnsucht – the addiction to longing – yearning.

Shouldn’t they be taught a lesson by yearning for the unattainable?

Truly yearning for something involves the tragedy of not being able to achieve it. Yearning is a lesson in patience, in devotion and ultimately, acceptance.

While I am slowly being numbed by the unhealthy amounts of moldy cheese in my stomach I being to fall into a coma, a state of numbness that is a consequence of the fulfilment of my longing. No longing anymore, for the cheese, just a state of lethargy. Devoid of emotions I rethink why I was eating so much cheese.

The emotions that come and go with yearning are never the same, but always intense. Contemplating what could have happened, yearning for the moment that never was and most likely never will be. It hits, always intense but never the same.

So while my longing for cheese led me to this state of immobility, I continue to yearn. For the big things, the noble and tragic things. The small ideas and the big emotions. The alternate realities, the things I am not, the lightness of my being that sparkles somewhere.

Perhaps I should get some more cheese. I mean, who will stop me?